Monday, April 11, 2011

Vespers II

By Joseph Hesch


Before dusk, feathered greyfriars chirp vespers,
while a woodpecker drills for dinner in the
pines behind the neatly furrowed,
crops of red brick.
Jingling wind chimes announce the huffing
passage of a Jack Russell terrier.
Madly circling his owner, he's a rogue satellite
straining against the gravitational pull of his leash,
lest he spin off into the unknown,
the lengthening shadows and benign dangers
of this suburban galaxy.
Each afternoon he and his rotund master planet
course around the development,
each cyclical foray another chance
to slip the similitude
of the little fellow’s days.
I feel the strain against the leash, too, 
always hoping to break from just a little
of the gravity that holds me captive to a life
made of circles, cycles and birdsong reminders
that tomorrow will be one more transit
toward a hoped-for someday when I don’t
have to carry so many worlds on my shoulders.


Let's take the idea presented in the shadorma "Vespers," and expand on that theme.

16 comments:

  1. Nicely done, vivid, clear writing. Love the satellite metaphor.

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  2. Excellent use of metaphor. I was right there and am right there..wishing today not so many worlds on my shoulder too. Thanks, Gay

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  3. super. and I'll never look at untrained dog on leash the same lol love the metaphor :)

    Monty / bummy

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  4. nice...so this is the expanded version of yesterday...i like it...an uplifting poetic romp...

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  5. Again, you place us right there with you, living the moment with a smile on our faces. Enjoyed this so much, Joe!

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  6. I like Brian's description of a "poetic romp"--it really fits this piece, though there is a lot of depth--and height--to it as well. Your language is crystalline as ever, and I love the astral metaphor and imagery!

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  7. I really enjoyed the way you speak. It's distinct, and I liked the last two lines best.

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  8. What a long way you have come from the original vespers. I like the metaphor of the celestial metaphors, and the step from the dog on the leash to your life.

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  9. Hi Joe - this doesn't really have to do with your Vespers, but I wanted to thank you for reading my poem about Grandma and bread. You are so on the ball, I was still messing with the intro!

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  10. sounds familiar to me joe...breaking free from the circles - not always easy - sometimes we have to take small steps..and a poem can be a good start..

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  11. What a lovely poem. Can just picture that hyper little Jack Russell running circles around his master (as we have one in our neighborhood that does the same each day). I liked how your turned this around into a metaphor for breaking free of your own circles and cycles. Really enjoyed reading (and rereading) this one.

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  12. nice piece, Joe. The descriptive passages are what really make this one for me. The dog, the birds, the dog's owner. You really took me there, to dusk.

    regards

    Luke @ WordSalad

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  13. love the metaphors but i could only picture my boston terrier in there, but yes, jack russell is more appropriate.

    really liked the phraseology in ths:

    "always hoping to break from just a little
    of the gravity that holds me captive to a life"

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  14. Lovely poem. There's the imagery of pulling away from gravity, but also of being the center of gravity, having to hold things together,

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  15. I really enjoyed this, particularly, “Jingling wind chimes announce the huffing passage of a Jack Russell terrier.” While there’s a weight to the poem, the ever-present pull against the leash, you leave a sense of hope with the reader that tomorrow is another day filled with birdsong and the possibility of breaking free from the ties that bind. Nice!

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